Cheers. She is the woman who gets stereotyped as a slut simply because she likes to fuck around. Actually this research was proven by a Womens Organization! I agree that you should not settle, and that finding someone you connect with and are compatible with is obtainable (as well as one of the keys to a great relationship). If youknow your man is secure, then why wouldnt you tell him the truth? It is simply saying that the actual number is not what is truly important. I completely understand where you are coming from. So dont judge her based on a number, evaluate her based on the woman she is today. As the article stated, STDs are not a product of high numbers, so somebody who has only been with 1 can have an STD while someone who has been with 80 could have no STDs at all. What non practical thing are you buying with your maintenance loan first. So, wat about da age do it matter? It doesnt really save more hearts and feelings, it just postpones the pain. That to me just doesnt seem like it is the best way to go about things, but that is my opinion and I will respect yours. Stefan probably didnt realize this was true while he was writing the article or even now. I am married to a wonderful woman with two kids. Respect the choices shes made with her own body, respect the decisions that led her to where she is now. He is happy, so should the number hold that much power and the relationship end? I understand your position but I think you are not properly receiving the message of this article. Most women judge good young men fa they age that aint been in so many relationships with out friendship first. great number of men for the same reason. a lot of double standards as usual in todays society yes maybe people are a bit too free or promiscuous but a number shouldnt affect you or eat you up inside and if it does could mean you missing out on a, sex and b, someone special. I get so excited all the time with her, cause I know she was a slut and Im proud of being a slut too. Our wisdom is a form a judgement. Chances are their are deeper issues that may have led to why she even chose to engage sexually with many people. His name is Jesus Christ. Its choices, not mistakes. That doesnt define who you will be. Nah, I would like somebody who had value for themselves like I did. Not at all. I Think that u r bringing this up is great and it needs to be talked about more.i Think when u Get older u Think more about this things and talk about it and see that people can change and of course u go thrue life experiance different things.we r not all the same and what people do different things and shouldnt be jugded by their past. Phsyically, Id agree. Exactly act like a slut then oh now i want a good man. Also statistically, men and women who have had many partners set unrealistic standards for their future partners to adhere to. Regardless, as I stated before you are entitled to your opinion. Joe is a silly young man who enjoys eating tomatoes for his breakfast. My personally opinion, 10 partners in a lifetime for men and women should be enough. Its not just your vagina you need to worry about think about your health. The past does matter, because granted imagine sleeping with the man or woman, exchanging fluids. were. That's pretty low for a guy". Will you feel it is worth walking away from this amazing woman because a couple of years ago she was once promiscuous. to pass on genes in males). Reply 122. Macho-ism still exists. If you are that Datson? Smh Of course Im gonna take the car with the less mileage on it. made and consequences stem from them. My number is 25. No, it can most certainly simply be about the actual number. Some of them were guys I knew actually friends of mine. Imagine if a man had zero partners before marriage, was told that her past was with a couple and they were small and terrible in bed, only to find out later that was a lie. YOU WOULD OWN THAT SHIT. On the other hand. She has actually opened a dialogue with me about the fast girls. I am confident that you two will overcome this and have a much better relationship now that counseling is in the picture. And there is no one besides Him. If a woman had many relationships and then relationships failed, this is other thing and issue yes.. It matters to me because I purposely don't sleep around. If you are a man with 3 children with 3 different mothers, there is something wrong. Anyone with a brain knows that a persons past is a huge reflection of themselves and that past actions can show a lot especially in regards to the human condition. All of the real "Studs" that I know in real life have a lot of sexual conquests, but they are now in their late 30's and 40's, alone, and miserable. pregnant with other males children, if given the choice. Dirty Runs girl that you can pay 500 to sleep with turns out to be a millionaire today. So if that woman is open and honest enough to tell that man her numbers, he may walk away from her before he even learns that she now does share the same values as he does. Big breasts which are an indication of youth (because old ones sag), long hair which is a sign of health (because malnourished people have brittle hair that breaks off), hourglass figure, high cheek bones, and pouty lips (all signs of high estrogen or fertility). He is attracted to children by nature. Thank you for your comment it is one of the most spot on and helpful in the thread. so we moved on.. after 2 yrs, i am look for an arranged marriage (pretty normal in India). Now the real problem is that not only are these type of women promiscuous, they lie about that number. All that energy goes to personal projects or commuter games. It was about not wanting to be holding hands or walking down the street with a female and having dudes walking by that shes slept with or the possibility of them making any comments butwhat dude can say theyve only been with a handful of women. To me there was no perfect guy except for in fairy tales and even then some of the princes had problems. Of course orgasms will be fine. Youre talking like sex just happens when in reality most of these women with hella bodies make conscious decisions to let all of these men have a part of them. I feel like I'm just in her head sometimes lmao. Men just want Women to stay loose, so they can keep getting laid daily! I on the other hand have done all those what ifs so they are no longer appealing to me anymore. However, all else being equal, women with more sexual partners are more likely to undergo a failed marriage. skyrocketing, deadbeat fathers, and in general a breakdown in our moral and The idea behind waiting for marriage may have been feasible decades ago but that ideology is based in religion and if youre not a religious person what exactly are you waiting for? Personally I believe that everyone should date whoever they want. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. the article was written by a man, which happens to be me. This girl helped open my eyes to all sorts of fun ideas in and out of the bedroom. PurplePillDebate is a neutral community to discuss sex and gender issues, specifically those pertaining to /r/TheBluePill and /r/TheRedPill. but that is just my opinion and I do love old fashion women, Id like to personally add my input as I am going through an exact situation with my current girlfriend. would sleep with them while single. deep. 8 Best Landing Page Builders This Year. Look stephan r watever ur name is.. it DOES matters and you sitting behind a damn screen debating with tha whole world on tha number of men a women sleeps with shouldnt matter when in reality it does in todays world. And I prefer to date her for a while before I sleep with her. I choose to try not do that. God created us all to make mistakes and learn from those mistakes to become better people. If you cant get in or she cant handle it can mess up the whole experience. It is what it is, but the most important part is your STD FREE!!!!! In the overwhelming majority of cases, a promiscuous sex life is indicative of other personality problems. Be happy you have a girl. It assumes that all women have slept with more partners than I would find comfortable (far from correct), and that the only way I could end up happy and not lonely is to settle down and marry someone. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Decisions determine who you are, end of story. I might ride in it a Basically, many women today want to be able to act like a whore while they are younger, and still settle down with a man in a stable marriage once they get their promiscuity out of their systems. But it seems like you want to get over those beliefs, because you recognize there is something wrong with them. Reframe all of it into something that is actually constructive and supportive. We're sinning again by lying! This function is innate to humans and does not become desensitized. Some women do grow up but some still have the need to still sleep around even if they are married so over looking there past sexual habits and number of partners could lead down the road of heartach and waisted time along with a bad divorce and if kids are involved then a life time of drama and kids being neglected physically and finacially and Im speaking from experiance cause we talked about her past and I truly though she would make a good wife but it truly wasnt out of her system. My message is simple, life and relationships require truth. I am trying to be forgiving which is why this article was very validating and informative. Maybe you just don't understand why she does it? I do not disagree with a lot you just said. Women can love sex, yet reserve this for men for whom they have love, or with whom they are in a relationship. It matters. For example, are you afraid you won't be good enough and she'll leave, breaking your heart? If you are confident, you will be more understanding of others. I KNOW that I am not missing out on anything. Ahh, so nice to hear that youve learned how to Google. although Ive had my fair share partners i dont like a woman who has. It only hurts her to vent. Thus conconcluding in divorce. Lets try this on for size: She is still the same woman she was before she told you the number, the only difference is how you will now choose to process it and treat her. There can be comparison issues, less patience due to what they have experienced previously, and a bunch of other stuff I will address in a future post. Im 26 years old and have never given myself to anyone. I definitely would not marry a woman who has slept around a lot. Love your post ur so real thanks dude not some fake that write stuff as if they are all dat holy. Some women can have a very low number and be as emotionally damages (if not more) then other women with a much higher number. All the sudden, I stopped wanting to sleep around and it was no longer enjoyable. Women have also the right to have fun. Ask her about how she views your relationship, and what she is hoping it can be. Let her know your goal is to simply be better, and to have peace within yourself about this issue. The average women doesnt care. I would say dont wait. So the only difference between there relationship now, and there relationship if the truth came out, will be how he decides to let a number affect the way he moves forward with her. The amount of partners a person chooses to share themselves with sexually reflects on that persons character and values. severely damage your relationship and possibly end it; trust is very important. A Woman or Man that sleeps with 100 people is emotionally DEAD! A) Two long-term sex partners, had sex a total of 1000 times. Hello Stephen I think we should all face reality Yes, this is the incident Dave Chappelle mercilessly ridiculed on his Comedy Central show in 2003, but you have to remember there was a real 14-year-old girl in that video, according to her. Also consider that all people who engage in a lot of casual sex have higher rates of depression and low self-esteem and lower rates of life satisfaction. Nobody likes for the woman they love to be viewed in that light. In a romantic sense any woman who sleeps around is unattractive to me. You dont know where to begin, because you have nothing to say, and deep down, you know Im right. going through a thinking mans head, the kind that most women want to marry. If you refuse to give a woman a chance because of her past, you might be missing out on a really good woman. Shit if u cant count your partners on both hands then u have a problem. Because even if it hurts, as you stated it will help you rebuild and move in a better direction. I completely disagree. As you stated, as long as she is disease free, there should be no issue. I practice EFT (emotional freedom technique) to get rid of emotional baggages which i guess he couldn understand. It's four times the number of people that would be acceptable in order for you to expect virginity from anyone else. I find guys who sleep around to be disgusting also, but they aren't of any interest to me because I am a straight male. Trust me I completely understand that most of us would prefer our partners didnt have active sex lives prior to being with us. Not saying that is ok and right, just pointing that out. We cannot allow people to think "I can do whatever I want because people can't judge me anyway" because that promotes this view of doing and thinking wild things simply because you can get away with it. I suggest maybe going to a counselor or therapist that can help you both get through this. I think you misunderstand the article, this is not an article to promote a womans right to be promiscuous. End of story. I dont thing something is wrong with a man who does not like the idea of competing with a womans past. No. She is 30. I guess it really doesnt matter. What I am saying is I dont feel it is best to allow that to overshadow everything else that is great about this woman and the fact that you believe she is best from you (aside from a possible past you arent too happy about). what associations are you making in regard to the fears and concerns you might have? She is the exact opposite of what my current girlfriend is. Perhaps you should take your own advice. The commandment was and is for both genders of mankind. Being promiscuous is bad for both men and women. Also women (and some men) get bored quickly these days. And yes, I enjoy educating the ignorant, such as yourself, on such topics. Couple days later it turned to 9. my gf was honest about her past and i constantly bring it up whenever we argue not saying its right but I cant help but think about the number all the time. I Have a lot to say but I will say this only I think you are not getting the point of this article. I agree 100%. I just wanted to share so that some man one day can know hes not alone. Would you marry a girl who slept around? Unpaid whores arent worth much.Sluts dont get rings. However, many men, when looking for long term partners, will look to women who have shown they can control themselves and not get ridden like the town bike. They almost always act differently then those who havent. Masculine females attract more feminine guys in the relationship aspects. Lol youre an idiot. Compare apples to apples, Crazy Obsessed Man. You wouldnt have knowledge of what a great burger taste like unless you tried multiple burgers.. Its ups and downs. Society is emotionally drained because of this ignorant behavior. I have a 13-year-old daughter. I believe is about decency. Oh you left them because of that? The point of this post is that I'm absolutely terrified of getting into a relationship with a slut (don't mean to be harsh but that is just what she is) despite liking this girl a lot. But the average man, when hes serious about a woman, does care. The first onewasvery faithful loyaland gave no other man any indication that he had any shot with her while the other flirtedetc and didnt see anything wrong with it because she hadnt had sex with anyone. Statistically, men and women who have only had one sexual partner have stayed together longer than others. But it hurts me to know that the girl I care about so much is just a notch on so many bedposts. If being old-fashioned for a woman means not being a slut, then old-fashioned will always be in style when men look for a mate to settle down with. Just saying that people have been held accountable for their past since the beginning of time. So the past could be the the reason they have a story to tell. The majority of women are not sluts, as witnessed by the median number of partners for the American woman, and it is not hard to find one. You could be killing yourselves with every partner you take. Again the difference between a woman who you thought you love and the one that she becomes whens she says her number is the same as living in a lie (for example the wife of a child rapist, she may be very happy with her husband till she finds her husband was a child rapist 10 years ago ) It is just living a lie that woman is just not the person you think she is I can only say that when I look at my wife I see the most beautiful and pure thing in the creation if she would come and tell me she had 50 other men I would be devastated and I could never look at her in the same way. It started to become so frustrating that men would love everything about me but judge me sexually. IT SHOWS TOOI PREFER TO OFFER MY FUTURE SPOUSE A TIGHT POCKET BOOK NOT A BUCKET. There is no double standard at all. I do agree that this topic deserves a lot of attention because I think people on both sides of the arguement have something positive they can learn or take away from this. Everyone has the right to judge and they WILL until the end of time as we know it and there is not damn thing wrong with it!!! You are correct in that position, but what I am saying in this article is to not make final judgement based more on their past instead of the person they are today. I plan to discuss why this has happened in a future post. So this woman never lied about anything. Stop posting this stupid things. Doesnt make it right, but remember, thats the flip side of a double standard. Life is short. and it goes on. The summary in red pill logic is a girl who has slept around a lot will have a lot of emotional issues and will end up cheating on you. 151 views, 6 likes, 8 loves, 22 comments, 4 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Miller Memorial Baptist Church: Sunday, February 26, 2023~ Reverend. We all have issues, so we have no right to be so quick to judge, and look down on others for their perceived issue. You can try to explain Him out of existence all you want. I love this woman and to make her feel secure I cut ties with all my girlfriends and avoided all women actually. You may not mind to share your life with someone who has share herself with everyone who show some interest but for me it is very a very important detail as it is part of the whole person you arechoosing since I have that capacity of choice I want to have a nice person as a whole including a matching in our values personally I am sure I would not go ahead with a woman with this kind ofbaggage. Also as I stated, women know that regardless of this article most men will judge them. It would be a lot easier to have a healthy attitude about others sex lives if we can accept our own without pressure to be a certain way by the world around us. Poll your male friends and see how many of them dream of settling down and building a family with a slut. This is a trite platitude devoid of meaning. And them same niggas see her walking around town with you..smmfh Hell Naw!!! Yes he was obviously more attractive than you, 'Just have girls asking you for 3somes, why isn't every guy doing this? If people would stop having children out of wed-lock this would alleviate some of these incidents. I love people who stand their ground and see things in black and white, right and wronglife is easiest for them. I can tell you first hand from experience that the man and woman that waits has a love affair that lasts a life time. He is the ALPHA and the OMEGA. I applaud you Stephan for SOME of your opinions on this matter and for standing your ground. Theres a dirty shaming name for women whove had volumes of sex but only recently has there been a label for men that also have many sexual experiences with many partners. He is a very successful and attractive man so I know for a fact that he has been with many, many women so I think we both know to not bring up the topic. I deserve better, and so would my children. Yes, her past is hurtful and hard for us both. It's also possible she has a crazy high libido, which if you build a commited relationship, can really come in handy when you start getting older and other men are in the "dead bedroom" phase, because they wanted to marry a virgin, who happened to have a very low libido, which made it easy for them to stay a virgin. Should I apply for accomodation now or later? I too have hurt my partner many times with my venting. so should that man walk away from her now just based off of him finding out a specific number despite the fact that how she is today makes him a happy man. I wouldn't stress it so much had I not have something to compare her to. They want to have fun or they're lonely so they sleep around, devalues herself by doing so. Why? The fact that Kim Kardashian is a role model for women is sickening. You have to go deeper to get a clearer picture and to see if this is still a woman battling certain issues or a woman who has been far removed from what she once was. Thank you so much : ) I really appreciate that. As does her likelihood of getting divorced. haha Also A LOCK that is open by any KEY is a USELESS LOCK!, To my point of view we all have our premises on how we chose our partners (size, color of eyes, color of hair, etc) for me the number of sexual partners of the person I would chose it would be also a factor I have to admit that bumping into a ex partner would be a negative effect but to me is more the idea of this person being more able of controlling herinstincts a bit better than an animal or not.. 6. Any person with more sex partners than years of life has an addiction and needs to be rehabilitated. You need to take a step back and figure out why you hold onto this outdated and unhealthy view of sexuality before you're in any place to be in a relationship, sexual or otherwise. . Only life itself can show you, but you can still choose to continue as is. 1. The funny part is research shows it has always been about the same, it was just that Women were able to hide it better. Rest 4-5 wait for. I think the double standard is wrong, but the answer for me is to use the same standard for men as we currently use for women. Im a guy who never really had any girlfriends, I turned down or was just completely blind to all advances to me and missed all opportunities, I never really cared (or told myself I didnt, but probably I did), I would be a virgin if it wasnt for the few random prostitutes I slept with yeh, something Im not happy about but I only did it cause I was lonely and never believed in myself, I had my heart broken a few times (yeh wahh wahh, I was young and a sensitive human being), I had chronic anxiety and the thought of even going on a date made me want to vomit so I never met anyone or just avoided it I was 28 before I finally met someone who actually loves me, I was blown away. I think people need to stop judging one another and get to know a person for who they are now and not the person they were in the past. Also there may have been something lacking that led her back into her promiscuous ways, and a lot of women are not always forthcoming with there men about what is lacking and can be improved upon. No two people are the same and regardless of what you may think, you dont ever know EVERYTHING there is to know about anyone. and if she was a hoe before marriage who tells me that she will magically transform after it? But until men realize that the more you all make advances towards us irregardless of what we declare we want, the more you promote promiscuity among your male circles, the more you all support the media that supports the sexual exploitation and objectification of women, then the more youll see women sleeping with a bunch of different men. The Virgin guy is one by choice. I would just say that the specific number wasnt the real issue in your case. The Student Room and The Uni Guide are both part of The Student Room Group. She's not who she's going to be, young women can be very insecure. thats okay. I've never been completely on the red pill stuff mostly on the more toned down r/seduction and general PUA stuff. I dont know what planet you come from but aint no way a man would want to wife a woman who has slept with every man in town. Instead of making the number of guys/gals she/he has been with a deal So having lots of casual sex it a good indicator that a woman has emotional problems. If they have changed and you feel some sort of potential, give them a chance. And guess what, in case you hadnt noticed, men and women are different. I do know that there are some who, respectfully, think otherwise. The person asking or the person who has the power to say yes or no ? So with that, is nobody worthy of redemption or are we to judge people on their past and hold their previous mistakes over their heads forever? 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